If You Wish it...it Will Come

Subconciously, I knew the truck wasn't going to swerve. And I didn't take my hands from the wheel. Not once. The impact took the breath right out of me. Endings are always hard.

My mother used to tell me, "Be careful what you wish for, darling." Looking back on yet another disintegrated relationship, I can't help but wonder...did I somehow wish the end? In all honesty, beginnings are awkward and endings are difficult...but the middles of things require the most work.

* * * *

The other night, I dreamt of a public book reading. I was lost in the gathering crowd, and there he was, suddenly standing in front of me looking at me with such fervor in his eyes and his palms held out. A book. His book. That afternoon among the many gathered there to hear his words, he read to me, directly to me. His eyes found mine in the crowd, that unmistakable and otherworldly connection. And then I woke up. It was 4am and nothing more than a dream. I hadn't spoken to him in over a year.

But when I checked my email that morning. He had written to me. At exactly 4am. Was it fate? Did I miss him so much that I wished that email into existence?

With him, it is always something.